29 July 2009

What Happens Now

I was sitting at my day job thinking today that it feels like ages since we screened the movie for the cast & crew, then I realized it was only a little over two weeks ago. That pretty much blew my mind.

I have been really impatient lately to get END seen, to hear back from festivals and to continue moving forward. It feels like I’ve stalled, but this morning made me realize we haven’t. It may feel like END has been done forever for me, but in reality it’s been less than two months since Bill, Telly & I finished post-production together.

I think more than anything what I am feeling right now is what any independent filmmaker feels when they get their movie done – a strange mix of satisfaction, pride and frustration. I’m so glad that I finished the film, but want others to see it so badly, and yet want to move on to another project but know I can’t as I still have to push everything I have into getting the film out there. There is a reason that you always read the interviews and hear the speeches by independent directors and producers who talk about spending two or three years on one movie. Even though they finish it relatively quickly there is a huge and overwhelming process you have to go through after the final celebration because you and not a studio marketing or exhibition branch are the only force pushing the film onto the public. It’s like trying to roll a boulder uphill on your own.

I have no doubt that this will be a rewarding process, and one that will help us all a great deal in our dreams, ambitions and careers, but that still means that there are miles to go before I sleep.